Only Joking! I never wished I was back in England (cue: imagine a devil emoji followed by a cosmo).
But here are some of the funnier things that have happened to me on year abroad:
1.The time I was called roast beef
Sitting, enjoying a nice glass of €3 wine, the bartender said to me ‘your friends are clearly French, but you, you my friend are a standard ‘roast beef”.
Now, of course it wasn’t phrased exactly like this (it was in French and lost in translation and all) but yes, a real French man called me roast beef in a real French bar (and then bought me a drink 😉 ). Bucket list check off point: tick.
2. The time I was told ‘it was no longer halloween’
Picture this: it was bucketing it down with rain. The heavens had opened and it was as if a flood of epic proportions was about to wipe away the centre of Paris. I was wearing a white shirt and hadn’t brought a coat with me (does anyone ever actually pay for cloakroom fees?!).
I was also lost and sans portable. I asked the first person I saw ‘do you know where the nearest metro station is please?’ in a bid to get my bearings. Their reply ‘your makeup is awful, it’s no longer halloween’.
Nope, I never did find out which metro station was the closest. But obviously everything was fine and I’m now sat here writing this post!
Ugh, okay, this one has actually made me long for overpriced tuition fees and contracts with only one page to sign.
Every contract comes with a tree’s worth of pages. And yep, every page needs initialling!
4. When my tinder date didn’t know where eggs came from.
a) I can’t believe I’m admitting to having gone on a tinder date.
b) An egg you eat was never going to hatch. Everyone got that? Yep, okay. Let’s move on…
5. I never really wanted to be back.